October 5, 2021

Old enough to know better


Today is his birthday. I don’t know how old he is anymore.
old enough to know better, that much is true.
and part of me wants to hold the boy that you were and say
I’m so sorry you didn’t get the love you deserved from your father
the other part of me wants to stay safe
so I burned the bridges I kept constructing out of false gods, fake smiles, and desperation for your approval
you can drink up your disappointment in me like I drink up mine in you
and I hope one day you’ll know what a spine feels like
because I do

breaking cycles. self healing poetry. father wound poetry